The elder statesman of the group. He doesn't say much, but when he does, it's not much! Oh yeah, and he plays guitar.


NAME: BälSäc

ALIAS: the Jaws ‘o Death

INSTRUMENT: Guitar

AGE: pi X 10 to the millionth power

HOME PLANET: Ennui

HEIGHT: 22 1⁄2 hands

WEIGHT: 12 tons fully dressed; 98lbs soaking wet

EYE COLOR: I’m not sure if he has eyes

HOBBIES: Wine tasting, home distilling, contemplating suicide

ON DATES I LIKE TO…: Contemplate suicide

QUOTE: “I’m so very, very sorry.

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